Unconditional Love vs Conditional Love

I’ve been reflecting on the last segment of the retreat on LOVE.   It was inspirational and confirmed and cleared up some confusion, both at the same time.

Can you help me with clarification?

I think of unconditional love as the “Fullness of Fullness”.  It has no subject and no object.  It just is.  It starts in the heart, but envelopes the whole body, and is the background of my experience in my day-to-day life.  It really is quite lovely, and I am eternally grateful.  It comes unbidden and resides unquestioned.  When touched, it springs into deeper connection and can equally encompass the environment around me.

So, if this is, in fact, an example of unconditional love, I am wondering about a particular conditional love.  I understand your definition of conditional love that you used on a retreat, as a mother’s love, relationship, family, etc.  What I am wondering about is my love for God.  Where does that fit in?

If it is devotional love for God in form, I would guess that it would be conditional…..but the God I speak of  is, “All in All” so there is nothing outside of God.  The God I speak of encompasses the Unconditional Love that buoys me through my day.  So, is this both unconditional and conditional?

The God I know is inside and outside; everywhere and nowhere all at the same time.  I know this as a direct experience. 

But my devotion to God is the meeting place where Infinity becomes a point.  It is the place where my humanism can touch God.  This is where I lay myself in supplication to the Divinity within.  I am humbled and in deep gratitude. 

But, as I write this, I can see that during those times, I am “other than” rather than “as one with” God.  Which would make it conditional.  There is a subject (me) and object (God) and devotion is the linkage.

So, I am wondering if this is the one place where Unconditional Love and conditional love meet.  It seems to be the knifes edge.  On one side, the Absolute, on the other the relative.

As you can see, I am very unclear about this, and haven’t found my way yet to resolution….thus this letter.

With utmost respect and (conditional) love,

Fleming Conley

Return Email From Yuan Tze (written by Melissa, his wife, who speaks fluent English)

Dearest,

It is so lovely to hear from you as always. Here is Yuan Tze’s attempt to clarify your questions.

First of all, your experience of love is very much likely one of the manifestations or experiences of unconditional love. We are very happy for you that you are able to experience love this way.

Secondly, about God. We can only speak from the perspective of Ren Xue, and we respect any other ways of viewing or relating to ‘God’. In Ren Xue, there is no external God.

Everything is the creation and manifestation of Dao, the wisdom of the universe, the laws of the universe. The universe is a totality and every one of its creations is also a totality and they are all connected. We don’t use the word ‘God’ to describe this totality. Because each one of us is a manifestation of the wisdom of the universe and is directly connected with it, there is no need for a place for us to meet the totality. We just need to unify ourselves, our heart and Shen, with the universe, we are with it. No medium or intermediary is necessary. Ren Xue is to help us do this better and better. 

Yuan Tze understands that many people, especially western people, use the concept of ‘God’ to access the essence of their lives and connect with the ‘higher’ existence. This is mainly to do with how God has been in their reference system of the consciousness from a young age in a culture ‘God’ is a strong component.

To reach our True Self, the reference system of the consciousness needs to be ’tidied up’ because this is the pool of information from which the consciousness draw information to form patterns, concepts etc. This is also why learning about the law of the universe and life is so important in Ren Xue. The teachings of RX is to help us build a reference system that reflects these laws.

Hopefully this helps clarify. With much love,